Nutritionally Incorrect Anthems: A Feast of the M60 Rebellious Mixtape (Volume #11)

20 Golden Greats, of the nutritionally incorrect variety

Burger King, Manchester
24 Hours from Whopper: Burger King, Mosley Street, Manchester. Image by Mikey (Creative Commons License – Some Rights Reserved).

Take a good look through your record collection. Can you think of any memorable songs or instrumental tunes extolling the joys of Iceberg Lettuce? Have you heard of a concept album dedicated to tofu? Or even a song? Well, apart from Killer Tofu by The Beets (the fictitious group in Nickelodeon’s/Jumbo Productions’ animated series, Doug), little of note. Continue reading “Nutritionally Incorrect Anthems: A Feast of the M60 Rebellious Mixtape (Volume #11)”

Rebellious Mixtape #10: One After 409

A musical tribute to the 1978 version of Rochdale Bus Station

Rochdale Bus Station, 2006 (retro style)
The old version of Rochdale bus station, photographed in 2006 (1978 – 2013).

Nostalgia’s a strange thing. I love the latest version of Rochdale bus station because of its improved tram connections and how everything is under one roof. No trying to run across roadways to catch a 528 for Halifax (because of the 409 being on the opposite platform). It is everything a modern transport interchange should be. Continue reading “Rebellious Mixtape #10: One After 409”

Rebellious Mixtape #8: The Greatest Narcissistic Personality Album in the World… Ever

Definitely not available in any shops, or on your favourite tax-dodging online retailer’s website either

Some time ago, I was with a good friend of mine and on the M56 motorway near Preston Brook, there was this Beyonce song which epitomised Dependent Personality Disorder. The lyrics – the drippiness of it all, mawkish, pleading nature – rubbed us up the wrong way. Shortly after boarding a train from Manchester Airport to Stalybridge, I hit upon the idea of a compilation album. It could have been called AC/DPD, as a nod to the seminal Anglo-Australian heavy rock group.

Almost five years on, I still couldn’t. Continue reading “Rebellious Mixtape #8: The Greatest Narcissistic Personality Album in the World… Ever”

Did I Really Want One of Those? 24. Dancing Flowers

Acceptable in the 1990s – even Andi Peters had one in the Broom Cupboard

16 January 2014: “Woke one morning half asleep/With all my blankets in a heap...” – the opening lines of The Move’s song reminded me of something I remembered seeing in my office. They were truly overhyped to high heaven and seldom danced to anything other than Jive Bunny and the Mastermixers’ greatest hits.

Continue reading “Did I Really Want One of Those? 24. Dancing Flowers”

Did I Really Want One of Those? 23. The Cascade Cassette 50 Compilation

50 games, and a calculator watch for £9.99?

15 January 2014: Continuing the subject of electronic atrocities, I was taken aback by my youngest child’s reaction when I brought my Commodore 64 downstairs from the attic. She asked:

‘Where’s the mouse?’
‘Try under the floorboards’ I flippantly said.
‘Strange USB port’ she replied ‘And what do you call this? How do you load a game?’

She was somewhat mystified by the vagaries of the C2N Datasette which I pointed to, and the selection of cassettes. She chose Turbo Outrun. Bad move I thought, especially that horrific multiload. Still better than Fido on Firebird’s Don’t Buy This compilation though.

Continue reading “Did I Really Want One of Those? 23. The Cascade Cassette 50 Compilation”

Did I Really Want One of Those? 22. Big Mouth Billy Bass

‘In the morning, laughing happy fish heads…’

14 January 2014: Cooker went on the blink. Yours truly had to make a brief sortie to the Marple Fish Bar. Happy days; mine’s haddock, chips, peas and their hottest curry!

Then my youngest one asked a question: ‘why do you never see singing fish?’ She has yet to see Walt Disney’s version of The Little Mermaid. Nor some contraption I bought at The Gadget Shop.

Continue reading “Did I Really Want One of Those? 22. Big Mouth Billy Bass”

Did I Really Want One of Those? 21. Mr Microphone

Wired for sound

13 January 2014: In the attic, I stumbled upon a Piccadilly Radio annual and on reading Tom Tyrrell’s writings, remembered one thing when I was years away from taking my ‘O’ Levels. As a Manchester United fan, I wanted to be the next Tom Tyrrell. Sometime between Play Guitar With Ulf Goran (us Granadaland residents had to wait another year for TISWAS, and my pen pal from Lichfield used to make me jealous about it till 1979), I saw an advertisement which meant one small step toward being paid to watch Manchester United. Or being thrown out of Stamford Bridge by Ken Bates and having to commentate on a mobile phone.

Needless to say, I mithered my parents for this. Instead they got me an Alba tape recorder with a proper microphone. Probably a much better move. Plus I never got my tapes back from Piccadilly Plaza, only a rejection letter and a The Bradshaws cassette.

Continue reading “Did I Really Want One of Those? 21. Mr Microphone”

Did I Really Want One of Those? 20. Ronco’s Space Invasion LP

A Spaceman Came Travelling…

12 January 2014: Stayed too long at The Armoury and made the mistake of taking part in karaoke. Thought it was a good idea to sing Ph.D’s 1982 classic I Won’t Let You Down. They didn’t have in their folder, so I settled for a Chris de Burgh song instead.

Continue reading “Did I Really Want One of Those? 20. Ronco’s Space Invasion LP”

Did I Really Want One of Those? 19. I’m In The Mood T-Shirts

If an enlarged picture paints a thousand words

11 January 2014: At The Armoury this afternoon I was talking about fashion disasters with my younger brother. I mentioned the Ra-Ra skirt a one time girlfriend of mine wore. Then he mentioned the Skouser. I shot him down with another one. He thought I had partaken too many pints of Trooper till I showed him the picture on my smartphone.

Continue reading “Did I Really Want One of Those? 19. I’m In The Mood T-Shirts”

Did I Really Want One of Those? 18. The E-Z Tracer

If an enlarged picture paints a thousand words

10 January 2014: Just realised how useless my drawing abilities were when my youngest child wanted me to draw an elephant.

Continue reading “Did I Really Want One of Those? 18. The E-Z Tracer”